The Importance of Alone Time

Sis, when is the last time you were alone? And I mean really alone to do whatever made you feel good. Until this weekend, it had been months for me! Although it was unplanned, it was right on time.

“Spending time alone in your own company reinforces your self-worth and is often the number-one way to replenish your resilience reserves.”

Sam Owen

Depletion

de·ple·tion/dəˈplēSH(ə)n

  1. reduction in the number or quantity of something.

Have you ever ran out of money to pay bills or felt completely exhausted at the end of a workout? That’s what depletion is like, you’re simply running out. When you’re a go getter, depletion can come often. Most days you’re running 150 mph with little to no breaks. Often times, you may even forget to eat. I hear you, I see you, I am YOU!

That’s why this weekend was so amazing for me! Saturday morning I was not feeling great at all. It’s usually the first sign that I’ve worked myself into the ground and need to rest. Between that and this unstable weather, Saturday was not looking too grand. My son’s first tournament game in basketball was in an hour and of course I had to be in attendance. Sometimes even the smallest act of obedience will yield a great reward.

I’m so glad that I showed up! As usual, My Mother in Love was there and she has been dedicating time to spend with the kids on the weekends lately which has been great because I’m ALWAYS working. We didn’t plan for her to take them ahead of time so you can imagine my excitement when she offered to take them with her after the game! It took everything for me not to dance right in the middle of the basketball court lol.

Listen, your girl loves her kids BUT your girl also needed a B-R-E-A-K!.

So what did I do? First I cleaned my house. It felt so good to be in silence and clean. As I was cleaning the house, I also began to feel lighter as far as the clutter in my mind. One less task! Whoo hoo!

Then I left the house and went to the Container Store because if you’re a planner girl with a productivity and organization obsession, CS is your spot! I purchased some bathroom vanity pieces, a jewelry organizer (because my Kendra Scott obsession is REAL) and a shoe rack. I made a conscious effort to purchase FOR ME! So often I’m swiping left and right for my spouse and kids, that I have to be reminded by my friends to do something for myself.

I left Container Store and swung by Pier1, what a treat! They’re closing several stores and I was able to snag their big 3 wick candles for $5 each! They smell so yummy! Sis, get to Pier1. The end.

Finally, I ended up at Sephora. We’re not even going to have that conversation becaaauuusse, make up 🤷🏾‍♀️. My final destination was to see the new movie, The Photograph, by Issa Rae. It was soooo good! I ate nachos and cried at the end. It was the perfect ending to my day.

“Solitude is where I place my chaos to rest and awaken my inner peace” ~ Nikki Rowe

Let me ask you, when is the last time you were alone and able to do whatever brought you peace? When’s the last time, you threw your phone in your purse and enjoyed the moment? The last time you stopped and smiled at strangers, took a deep breathe, didn’t constantly check the time on your watch or phone to make sure you weren’t late to someone’s event? I’m 99% sure those questions may have just made a light bulb go off in your head saying, “OMG! I need to be alone!” Don’t be afraid to say to yourself, “I need space.” There’s beauty in realizing that you need restoration and your resources are depleted. You can not and will not stay the course, if your resources are dried up! When looking at your plans this week, create some time for yourself that is solely for you to recharge and do what makes you happy. Don’t worry about anyone else’s agenda, they’ll be there when you return.

Until Next Time,

XOXO

It’s Time to Start, No Excuses

Hey Gem! I’m Going to Talk to You Today About the Art of Starting.

Are you stuck in between a rock and a hard place? Do you have the desire to do something but you been sitting on your hands scared of the outcome? Today I am talking to you! You, my dear gem, have to get off your behind and get to work. Someone out there needs your vision to fulfill their destiny.

In 2017, I was LOST.

I had recently given birth to my daughter and was on a maternity leave from a job that I was growing to resent on a daily basis due to the structural changes that were taking place. I was stuck with the decision of going back to work and being miserable or finding a different and hopefully better route. 3 years later, I’m sitting at my computer, it’s 7:05 in the morning on a Sunday and I am SO HAPPY to be in a position to write this blog post to you.

Starting is scary, hard and difficult but the end result is so incredibly worth it. At this stage in the game with the current climate of the world as a whole, you need to do what you love. So why aren’t you starting? Well, if you’re anything like me three years ago, the main reason is because you are scared and you don’t want to lose your security blanket. Your job, your spouse, your friends, family etc is in essence your security net. You’ve worked hard to build and maintain these relationships and you’re afraid that if you do what you’re passionate about those things or people will not support you. You’re afraid of being left behind. The irony here is that by pursuing your God-given purpose, you can only be pushed ahead never behind.

I remember sitting at home worrying about how to help provide for my family and not miss a beat. The moment I made the exact decision to be obedient to the calling that was on my life, we’ve never missed a meal, never felt like we were going to lose a home or a car and never felt like we were suffering. God provides. That day was May 12, 2017.

I made this post yesterday that I’m going to share with you here.

This is Your Friendly Saturday Reminder that 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐈𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬. ⁣

You Are Equipped with Every Tool Needed to Fulfill Your God-Given Purpose. ⁣

God Will Place Mentors, Educators, Investors and Every Single Thing Needed to Elevate You to the Next Level. ⁣

•Choose Obedience. ⁣
•Choose to do the Necessary Work Over Sleep. ⁣
•Focus On the End Game Result Instead of Instant Gratification. ⁣
•When You “Make It” Keep Working Like You Never Had It. ⁣
•Stay Hungry. Stay Grateful. Stay Passionate. ⁣
•You Are Your Biggest Cheerleader & Your Biggest Critic. ⁣
•Be Mindful & Consciously Aware that Every Decision is A Choice that Will Propel You or Keep You Stagnant. ⁣
•Get Around Winners! Latch On To Them & Gain Wisdom. ⁣

…And When All Else Fails, Celebrate the Fact that You Had Enough Courage to Try. ⁣

The purpose of the post was to encourage you to try. Often times, we become so focused on everything being perfect and everyone applauding our efforts that we forget to at minimum, try. Who says you don’t have the ability to write out a business plan or just write down the goal? Who says you’re incapable of selling yourself and creating the life you envisioned for yourself? Who says that one person can have a grand life and you can’t?

NO ONE.

You are your own worst enemy. Remove the idea that someone has to approve your dream in order for you to pursue it. When I started G&C, I didn’t care who approved my efforts, I cared about feeding my children and waking up to do something I loved every single day. That’s what mattered most to me.

I surrendered to God’s purpose for my life. I was called to lead, to inspire and to be an example of what it looks like when you walk in total obedience. Many may ask, what does obedience look like?

Obedience starts with discipline. If you tend to lean on the side of rebellion, I encourage you to develop a routine. If you’re working in Corporate America, wake up an hour earlier than you normally do everyday and dedicate that one hour to your dreams. Commit to yourself that you will not create excuses nor complain. Tell yourself, neither is an option while you’re building the life you desire. Understand that it will be hard! I want you to find a mentor once you’re all in, wait until then because you don’t want to waste their time and miss your opportunity. Every time you consider taking an extended nap, decide to commit that time to your goals. What I’m saying to you may seem simplistic while reading but takes a lot more effort and discipline than you think. Here’s the thing, you can do it. You can do any and everything that you set your mind to do. No one is holding you back but you. In 2020, excuses are unacceptable. You’re either doing the work or moving out of the way. Make a choice today. Stop waiting, time definitely isn’t.

Until Next Time,

XOXO

January Was Rough! Time for a Shift

Hey Gem!

If Your January was Anything like Mine then Basically IT WAS ROUGH! I honestly didn’t know if I was coming or going. I felt like I wasn’t near as enthusiastic as I needed to be and that I was being attacked left and right.

A little pretext: January involved not 1 but 3 instances of other people trying to steal my designs and sell them or tell others to copy them instead of supporting me. Not only that, I was constantly receiving insight about someone who is not the biggest fan of Felicia (aka me) and moves that they were making to undercut me. It was a lot to take on while still trying to manage a little something we like to call Grace.

As strong as I appear to be, I’m still human and when you’re a human it’s hard to overlook everything. Somewhere within the month I lost myself. I found myself being constantly upset, wanting to start a war, desiring to speak out and more. I had become someone I fought so hard not to be. Now most people will say I was still graceful but for me, I stepped a couple levels below who I KNOW I am. It was rough y’all, rough! Not to mention that I was sick for literally an ENTIRE Month. Now on the outside everything looked great, my business was BOOMING, I still managed to generate 5 figures in sales, launch my I AM Collection, announce a getaway for my customers and more. However, inside there was nothing but turmoil.

The beauty of turmoil though is that hopefully you’re learning a very valuable lesson while you’re trying to pass the test. What I have learned is how to recognize when I’m allowing outside forces to control my narrative. I am realizing that with a simple shift in my focus, I can get right back to me like I never left. So what does a shift in focus look like? I can only speak for myself but a focus shift for me is when I put my attention back on Christ and what he has called me to do. When I stop worrying and allowing others to have a say so in how I operate. It’s also when I put the blinders back on and grind like never before. When you shift the focus, you quickly find that you are motivated again, you’re creative, you don’t need validation and you laser in on nothing but positivity.

Some ways to shift the focus would be to listen to a podcast, read a book, take a walk, journal, go to therapy, be intentional about your day, be intentional about the things you listen to and the conversations you engage in as well. Basically you are making a conscious effort to reduce any and all negative thoughts and anything that could potentially be a trigger for negativity.

My goal here is for you to take a page out of my book, look at the people and things you’re surrounding yourself with and make sure it’s a good environment for you to be in. Be sure that your friends are truly your friends, evaluate your work space and any other space that you occupy, express to your spouse that you’re going through a rough mental patch and need his/her help and prayer and most importantly unplug. Learn how to enjoy your own company.

We all go through ruts, that’s life but it’s how you get out of the funk and the lesson you learned while in it that matters. Once you make that choice to shift the focus, leave me a comment below with your thoughts and your success story. Make sure that you join me every Thursday on Youtube Live at 7pm CST. This week we will discuss shifting the focus further.

When & How to Allow Faith to Stand In The Gap for You

Hey Gem! I’m Back & I Have to be Honest with You, It Was Not My Intention to Drop A New Blog Post So Soon. However, After My First Post I Have Been Craving to Write More.

This Blog is Giving Me A New Outlet & If It Resonates with Any of You then I’ve Done My Part. What I Want to Discuss With You Today is When To Allow Your Faith to Stand In the Gap For You.

What is “The Gap”? For Me, The Gap is Fear, Disappointment, Doubt & When I’m Unsure of Something. The Gap is that Space Between I Know I Should but I’m Not Sure If This’ll Work. Oftentimes, I Find Myself Having To Let Faith Take the Reigns & Make My Flesh Take A Backseat. I’ve Learned Over the Years that I’ve Allowed My Fears to Stop Me from Reaching My Goals. Fear Can Be A Heavy Burden to Carry Around. It Makes You Second Guess Yourself, Question People’s Motives, Doubt Your Abilities & Gives You So Many Other Negative Feelings. Fear is In Fact An Attack of the Enemy. Anytime You Allow Fear to Win, You’ve Allowed the Devil to Also Win. The Two Go Hand In Hand.

So What Actions Have I Taken to Stop Fear & Doubt In Its Track. First, I Am Aware Of My Thoughts & How I Process Things. Typically, I Have A Random Idea and Immediately I Start Thinking Of All the Ways It Won’t Work. I’ve Had to Train My Mind to Think Positive First & Never Negative. It Was A WHOLE Struggle but I Would Not Be Where I Am Today Had I Let Fear Overshadow My Faith. Secondly, I Had to Give My Faith the Opportunity & Space to Grow. I Had to Speak to My Faith Daily Which Consisted Of Me Saying Affirmations, Journaling, Getting In the Word Of God & Constantly Thinking Positive Thoughts. You Have to Feed Your Faith Just Like You Feed Fear. It’s Literally the Size Of A Mustard Seed but If You Water It Daily, It Will Grow. Lastly, I Had to Learn to Trust My Faith & My Own Intuition. You Have to Learn to Truly Believe In Your Ability to Achieve Greatness. Learning to Trust My Faith Was My Biggest Hurdle Because Trusting Your Faith Means to Put It Into the Atmosphere & Then Do the Work Necessary in the Background to Bring Your Ideas Into Fruition.

Life Has A Funny Way Of Turning Our Worlds Upside & If We Don’t Have Faith in Our Talents and Abilities, We Won’t Survive. Take Today for Instance, I’ve Been Feeling Some Type Of Way Lately in Regards to Other People’s Opinions & How They View Me Without Giving My Faith A Fighting Chance to Work for Me. Instead of Taking A Backseat and Standing Firm On What I Know to Be True, I Allowed Outside Thoughts to Cloud My Vision. But Because I Am Aware Of How I Process & Operate, I Woke Up this Morning and I Got In the Word, Listened to A Podcast & Blasted Fred Hammond. I Realized that I Haven’t Been Feeding My Faith. I Wasn’t Refueling My Faith Gas Tank to Keep Me Lifted at All Times. I Had to Correct My Thoughts. I Had to Speak Life Into My Right Now & My Future. Again Faith Without Work is Dead. If You Don’t Activate Your Faith It’s No Wonder that You Doubt Yourself. It Explains Why You’re Fearful Of Taking that Leap.

I Want to Encourage You Today to Feed Your Faith. Give Life to Your Faith & Stand On It Firmly Knowing that Without A Shadow Of A Doubt You & You Will Achieve Greatness. If Nothing Else, If Your Faith Needs A Little More Help Call On Jesus. That’s My Gem for Today. Until Next Time, Smooches 💎

Don’t Forget to Hit Like and Leave Me A Comment on Your Thoughts Below.